LOVE AND RESPECT

Ephesians 5:33 "So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." God commanded husband to love his wife with agape love ( unconditional or godlike love) but designed the nature of the wife to love more naturally at the level of intimacy. Therefore, God reveals to a man that he must work harder at loving his wife than his wife works at loving him. What she does by nature (created by God to no significant credit to herself), her husband must do under divine command and with a greater struggle (a struggle God allows, to no fault of the husband). God commanded a wife to respect in a way that he does not command a husband to respect. WHY? She respects less naturally than her husband. God does not command a husband to respect because God designed him to live by an honor code. It is within his nature to conduct himself respectfully. A wife does not naturally show respect when she feels unloved, whereas she loves naturally. she disrespects naturally.

In a similar way, husband loves less naturally when he feels disrespected, whereas he respects naturally, he does not love naturally. He naturally shows harshness and hostility when his wife shows him disrespect. WITHOUT LOVE SHE REACTS WITHOUT RESPECT AND WITHOUT RESPECT HE REACTS WITHOUT LOVE. No one denies we need love and respect equally. But generally speaking and based on Eph 5:33, wives love more easily than they respect and husbands respect more easily than they love. That is why the scripture commands husband to love his wife and commands wife to respect her husband.Thus, she has a greater felt need for husband's love and he has a greater felt need for his wife's respect. Just like we all need water and food equally, a wife has a felt need for love and a husband has a felt need for respect too, but if we reject this idea, we will fail to understand what is happening in the spirit of a spouse, and our spouse will fail to understand us.